One & Done - ROBO-JOE
"I am stronger. I am faster. I am Robo-J.O.E."
The battle between G.I. Joe and Cobra took to the stars in a big way in 1993 with the Star Brigade series. Several existing characters on both sides suited up for new battles above the Earth. Only one new character appeared in the first series, one with his own unique backstory - Robo-J.O.E.
The details for Robo-JOE's origin are found in his file card. As the story goes... brilliant, mild-mannered G.I. Joe scientist, Greg Scott, was working in his laboratory late one night - hard at work on some new Robotic Space battle Armor. Then suddenly, that dastardly villain, Destro, raided the facility, stealing "some" of the Battle Armor plans and seriously injuring Scott. Other Joe scientists (apparently there are several of these) used Scott's tech and built him back to life as ROBO-JOE - a half man, half robot Star Brigade soldier.
The figure for Robo-JOE is an Armor-Tech figure. This was a group of 6 figures in the Star Brigade line that were bulked up more than the standard figure because of their Robotic Battle Armor. Due to this larger size, there was a loss in articulation for the figures.
Robo-JOE had an orange and black color scheme. The black parts of his armor had an orange speckle-painted effect on it. Half of Robo-JOE's face was gold and robotic, while the other was human with black hair.
Being a member of Star Brigade Armor-Tech unfortunately didn't award Robo-JOE with many special accessories. Most of his gear came from the standard 90's generic weapons tree. This included Muskrat's shotgun and machette, Grunt's (v3) rifle, Tracker's submachine gun and two missiles - all in gold plastic. Not attached to the tree, he came with a black helmet that had raised points on the front - this gives it a bit of a Batman-ish look. He also had an orange missile launcher. The missile launcher could peg onto the shoulder or could be held in the figures hand.
So what's GOOD about the Robo-JOE figure? I have to say, the speckle paint job is pretty cool! Maybe there could have been a better choice of color, but I do like the way it looks. I also like the shoulder-mounted rocket launcher. I thought this was great... and bonus that he could switch and carry it by hand. The half-robot face is interesting and I also like the helmet a lot!
Unfortunately, the BAD far out-weights the good here. First of all, for being a bulked up figure from the armor... he is not much taller than a regular Joe figure. Basically just wider and with a loss of articulation to boot! There are some details on the armor that would look better if they were painted! The weapons tree is horribly uninspiring. These figures are supposed to have this high-tech, supreme-o armor, yet they get stuck with old rehashed weapons that don't belong to them. A machette and a shotgun??? That's what I get with my fancy spacesuit? How is that going to take down one B.A.A.T.??? It won't. He better have plenty of rockets on hand, because he's going to need them! If we really don't care that our armored, super-warrior is carrying a machette in space, let's just really dump on him - outfit him with Croc Master's whip and Law's nightstick!!
Another problem is the arm rocket launchers from this sub-group. Robo-JOE does not have one, but I feel he should! This is where the arm is just a rocket launcher. This is actually a clever idea... if used on the proper characters and it wasn't. Duke, Destro and Heavy Duty are outfitted with these. Where does their arm go? INSIDE the launcher? Tucked in the outfit? Whatever the idea is, it seems ridiculous. Robo-JOE and the B.A.A.T., however, would have been perfect for this. One is a robot, the other is half robot. Makes sense right?
Finally... the file card is a mess! His Primary Military Specialty is Criminal Termination??? Am I understanding this correctly? He terminates criminals? Are there a lot of these in space? Then his Secondary Military Specialty is Outlaw Incarceration??? I'm sure there is just a slew of outlaws running all around the moon! So basically what we do is - we outfit this guy with super-ultra battle armor, and then we send him into space to terminate criminals and incarcerate outlaws. I hope he can tell the difference...
It also claims he was "fatally wounded". Okay Hasbro File Card Guy... that does not mean he was left a "shattered, broken shell of a man"... it means he was dead. Sheesh... Seriously, I hope the writer does not have this file card as a sample in his writing portfolio. He may never get employed as a writer again.
Looking at the Robo-JOE figure on his own... he seems pretty cool. If you put him next to a more classic figure though, he will pale in comparison due to the other figure's superior articulation and proper accessories! Add in the silly file card and the swiping of the name idea from Robo-Cop and the figure of Robo-JOE just isn't working that well for me. I'm going to have to give Robo-JOE a weak rating of 1 out of 5 Cans of Clearanced Neon Orange Spray Paint. This is a shame, because there was some great ideas here! The execution was just way off!
So what are YOUR thoughts on Robo-JOE??? Did you like him? Did you think he was a winner? The best figure you ever had? Your dream character to cosplay? Let me know your thoughts below...
Even MORE continued rantings about Robo-JOE...
--- Interestingly, he is referenced on Gear's file card from 1994. Though the Armor-Tech figures had disappeared after 1993, it is still interesting they kept with the continuity. Gears and his Power Fighter, however, WERE originally slated for 1993 release. So maybe the file card was finished and they just stayed with it.
--- Thanks to HCC788, I look at this figure and think "Robo-J-TOE". HCC pointed out in his review of this figure that JOE stands for Jet Tech Operations Expert. So it should be "J-TOE."
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